The Weekly Skirt Report - Loyalty with pie in the face

I am continuing my thought process on the word Loyalty. This time with Pie in the face. Not for a giggle or a laugh but as a slap in the face or an insult.

Loyalty again is word that is abused and misread at times. Alot of times there are some that have NO idea what it mean to be and then some that do and then abuse it. Dissecting word is fun when you can find out that the meaning has changed so much and we apply it to our present lives mistakenly.

After being loyal to something or someone for a long time, you think, well, don't I get something in return? Will I get even a "thank you?" Did I do a good job? Wasn't I a good shoulder to cry on? Why am I feeling this way?

Pie in the face. The emotional side of the word is gross. The fear, the cold shoulder, the love, the flowers, the lunches, the hugs, the high fives - whatever you got in return - leaves you questioning the word. We try so hard to do good, be good that we ended up hating ourselves for thinking about why we were loyal.

"Why did I fall for his good looks but crummy attitude?"
"After all that hard work and they don't even say hi to me?"
"When all I did was the work they asked me to do..."
"What did I do?"

These questions are asked everyday. For everything we do. Others will say, "it's not you, it's them..." yeah but history has a way of repeating. So pie in the face is fine, makes us stronger right?

We equal that with even though we did our best, got everything right and having it paraded around like a new girlfriend that is prettier or the boyfriend that is smarter. Think of cars having emotions... we drive it around for a few years and it starts every time and then one day, they are traded. "What did I do?" a cry comes from the engine....

I sometimes think like Dr. Seuss. That everything has a voice. A heart. And feelings.

So, why are we so bad at being loyal. Are we scared of something? Ah I think I know. We are so bad at being loyal because we are so scared of rejection. It takes a mighty big heart to brush that off and stand up. It takes a lot to ourselves, ... it really does.

We are loyal to a fault. We are people pleasers at heart. We love everyone. We hate everything.

What happened?

Maybe, it's not what happened, but WHAT DIDN'T HAPPEN. So many angles to this huh?

JK

The Weekly Skirt Report - Where did Lester Bangs go?

The Weekly Skirt Report: Where's Lester Bangs when we need him....

Wow. I've been reeling about on this subject for weeks. The art of writing about music. I am going to start picketing about this..."Use better words" and "who cares who's dating who"... and WHO CARES if Dublin IGNORED Jay- Z and Beyonce... WHO CARES. I dismissed Elton John back in 1993 at Macy's it was probably his BEST DAY EVER. Everyone else, FREAKED OUT. They took his credit card receipts and started to make copies of his signature. Then the store manager got wind of it and had to go collect and shred them. Because it's illegal...

When I went to search for a quote on a client, I really couldn't find one with any kind of substance, meat or even fried fish, on it. These kinds of musical reviews and interviews are gone. NO MORE. I should've gone to a client of mine for a better one. Maybe he outta have a seminar on how to create and design strong quotes. I could always rely on him for just that. One of his best was basically this, "anywhere they have potato chips and electricity."

When an editor of Billboard gets kicked to the curb because he wanted to bring "true music writing back", we have a HUGE problem. Leave the yellow journalism to the National Enquirer, the Examiner and the Globe. You know the ones all based out of Florida?

"But the arts have suffered the most from this mind-numbing approach. Music, in particular, gets treated as one more lifestyle accessory, no different from a stylish smartphone or pair of running shoes. Hard-nosed criticism is squeezed out by soft stories, gossip and fluff. For better or worse, music journalism has retreated into a permanent TMZ-zone, where paparazzi and prattlers, not critics, set the tone." - (taken from the story link below)

When someone shows their intellect about music, by using the actual lingo, words and can sing and play along with it, DON"T laugh JoLo, learn sweetie. Harry and Keith KNOW what they are talking about.
If we need help in the make up world or dress world we will come back to you.

Music is not a bracelet... it's an art form. I hope one day Lester Bangs comes back from the dead and takes a red marker to your reviews... or better yet, use the paper to light up with.

Where did this idea come from? Are we not teaching students the art of writing? What will happen in the next 20 years, is it contagious? WHY are we watering down? WHY?

One day it's all gonna change and we won't have names anymore...

http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2014/03/18/music-criticism-has-degenerated-into-lifestyle-reporting.html



jk

FRIDAY MARCH 21st at Sam Ash Music in NYC - THESE GUYS:

ROYAL SOUTHERN BROTHERHOOD"S GROOVE SECTION - YONRICO SCOTT AND CHARLIE WOOTON - will be live at the NYC Sam Ash location. GO GO GO!!

They are super talented and super sweet... Yes you can tell them I told you so. 

JK

The Weekly Skirt Report - Confetti will go everywhere

This quote, from the ABC news head chick, gave me reason to believe that NOW is the time to do it... do what? Hmmmm that's the surprise. So, I made and posted this photo: 

Then my pal posted the Incubus song, of the same title... I listened and then I found the words. WOW. How connected is that. I present my new Chant, my new anthem, and my new song of empowerment. 

"If Not Now, When?"

I have waited

Dined on ashes

Swung from chandeliers and climbed Everest

And none of it's got me close to this

I've waited all my life

If not now, when will I?

We've been good

Even a blast, but

Don't you feel like something's missing here?

Don't you dare

I've waited all my life

If not now, when will I?

Stand up and face the bright light

Don't hide your eyes

It's time

No umbrellas

No sunglasses

Hailing Hallelujah everyday

I've waited all my life

If not now, when will I?

Stand up and face the bright light

Don't hide your eyes

It's time

The Weekly Skirt Report - Loyalty

This Week's Report is about Loyalty. I hope.

The dictionary definition of the word is:

loy·al·ty

  [loi-uhl-tee]  Show IPA

noun, plural loy·al·ties.

1.

the state or quality of being loyal; faithfulness to commitments or obligations.

2.

faithful adherence to a sovereign, government, leader, cause, etc.

3.

an example or instance of faithfulness, adherence, or the like: a man with fierce loyalties.

Origin: 
1350–1400; Middle English loialte  < Middle French.  See loyal, -ty2

Related forms

non·loy·al·ty, noun, plural non·loy·al·ties.

o·ver·loy·al·ty, noun, plural o·ver·loy·al·ties.

un·loy·al·ty, noun, plural un·loy·al·ties.

Synonyms 
2. fealty, devotion, constancy. Loyalty, allegiance, fidelity all imply a sense of duty or of devoted attachment to something or someone. Loyalty connotes sentiment and the feeling of devotion that oneholds for one's country, creed, family, friends, etc. Allegiance applies particularly to a citizen's duty to his or her country, or, by extension, one's obligation to support a party, cause, leader, etc. Fidelity implies unwavering devotion and allegiance to a person, principle, etc.

BUT WHAT DOES IT MEAN NOW... from the origin in 1350 to now 2014... 

Is it the same? Is it abused? 

If we think life was WAY different in 1350, it was the Italian Renaissance, one of my most favored times in human kind. Art, religion, inventions, it was a growth time. People finding out things that made them loyal to each other, being enlightened with the world around them. It unfortunately started with the Black Death, so maybe that's why it started because the population had to rely on each other to survive. And as this time period continued, it prospered to a larger note for example, had we not been loyal to the arts, we would've never known the unique mind of Leonardo Di Vinci, Michelangelo or la famiglia De Medici. 

So fast forward the tape, to 2014...

We see alot of people separate from their loyalty to each other over money, betrayal, mental and emotional power over each other. Married people, business to business, charities falling a part due to misconduct. Even churches fall apart due to disagreements on the simple things, like gay marriage. What folks don't realize, that there are probably more gay marriages lasting longer than ones with a man and a woman, and we forget that you go to the COURTS first to get your license to be unionized, and after that it's up to you to run down the aisle or not. Okay so that was a run off on a small tangent. But the word loyalty runs through that too.

But a lot of what we are seeing nowadays, starts with financial woes - why did A take all that money from B?

Or why did the baseball player leave his hometown team? More money or better chances at bat?
Probably money.

Maybe it's to gain political power. To over throw a country we are seeing that in Ukraine and Venezuela. Governments to rise above and sink others. By the way how does one over take a building nowadays - lick the door knob? NOW to me to over throw a country that is corrupt and make it better so everyone can be happy is different but money and power is still at large. Running around trying to find its place. BUT it is a noble thing to do. 

But what about personal loyalty to friends, family, companies we work for, restaurants, even dry cleaners! These things shouldn't have any money to come between them but it does. It does. I find myself, looking around at others my age, and I can count on two hands how many jobs they have had compared to my 18 years at my one. I can see in banks or loan officers the gleam in their eyes that I've held the same job for that long - that aha! moment but is it such a big deal now. 

Back in the old days... you know when your dad or granddad would work for a place for YEARS he got rewarded, with a good pension plan and retirement so everyone would be happy. Is that a dream now? Having loyalty given back to you for being just that. A good employee. Dotting I's and crossing T's?

I am starting to question this word myself. I throw myself at the mercy of some and I get flung back into space. I take friendships and working relationships very seriously to the point of default. Is that a point against me? Is that a sin that I'm even bringing it up? Or am I hurting myself? Thoughts race through my head, well, I don't wanna damaged anything so when that time comes or a reputation gets bruised then I am not the good girl. 

Now. I am not sure.
Then two days later I am sure.
Or am I?

And then confusion sets in. To create more dis-chord. Makes us sing, "Should I stay or should I go?" Stupid Clash song... I hate it when I start singing it. It's usually at the wrong time or the right place and I am scared that it will send the wrong signal. And I am doing it trying to sort it all out.

Ok back to loyalty.

There's a lot to say for it. There's a lot of trust in the word loyal a lot of reliance on performing on a level of expectations. It's one thing to be loyal to someone because you'd want it to be given back one day. You know, the Golden Rule?

But it's also a heart word, meaning it takes a big heart to be loyal to one thing and one thing only. And when that loyalty is bruised the heart is broken. And faith, love, trust is all wrapped into something that once broken is hard to mend. Have I cried over loyalty? YUP! Have I gotten so mad, I scream... sure you got it. Have I thrown a TV out the window. No sorry. I don't have enough money to get it all repaired and replaced. Do I realize that not everything is perfect? Duh Yeah... I might be dumb but I am not stupid.

Maybe that's why I question it so.

Hearts don't like to be hurt or stomped on or split in two. I mean one side has to work with the other, in order to work together. It's got to be loyal.

So while loyal seems like an old fashioned idea, it's really truly magical when it happens and when it lasts. That's the ticket...lasting loyalty. And I am talking years not minutes...

Bomb Magazine article

This might ease your mind on your ever-changing world of change...

http://bombsite.com/issues/99/articles/2882

The Weekly Skirt Report - Stop Walking Away

My weekly skirt report is going to be a tad different maybe even un-decode-able. So if you have decoder ring you are ready to go.

THIS IS MY OPINION SO DON"T HANG ME

Stop Walking Away: 

After much thought, by talking to myself in the car trying to sort out my thoughts I've come to the realization that we all need to think better. You know, "work smarter not harder" but "think better not longer." Cause we all know when time outs last more than 5 or so minutes, we start thinking of other things.

So, after trying to make sense on a post the other day on Facebook which I withdrew my comments and such after thinking better about it, I began to weigh my thoughts as if I was talking to those people in a room, face to face not keyboard to keyboard.

I am not gonna say what it was about, but note that it riled people's inner Buford T. Pusser to go kick some ass. I get the emotional uprising but there's more at stake here than that. Our perception of people who flip out is basically because our views of mental illness is so warped, confused and unforgiving that we tend to over look the real problem. When people flip out as we say, we tend to think he's lost his marbles or crazy. When friends and family members are not their usual self, reacting to simple tasks and situations in a questionable manner, don't throw away the key, talk to them, work with them for the simple task of letting out their junk in a verbal way, (as my friend and me say, to make room for more junk) can save people - calm them down etc. The old "get it off your chest" is real folks.

If someone is killed because of someone's behavior then try to figure out, pick apart to see where the red flags or signs were, in the person's past and where you ignored it. What made them do it - why did they do it and most of how can we break the circle of it happening again with others around us. Try to see others in the circle of the situation and check with them, to see how they can walk away stronger and better, so when they feel themselves change, mentally to make themselves do something wrong that could be life changing. Something like murder will leave a huge mark on their family and friends. Learn from this. The effects will be deep and if you think executing the killer is gonna end it, you're wrong.

I understand this on two fronts - both are personal; one could've been helped and one was helped beyond the efforts to point of default. But one was too scared of living and dying at the same time and the other just didn't want to put forth the effort and so they both gave up. Why? Probably after years of trying to help them, family and friends, gave up or didn't come quick enough or didn't know what to do and it was too late. The effects on the family and friends, are still reeling today. It's been 13 years for one of the two after their death.

So what to do.

Well, for one, if one of these peoples are sent to the hospital or prison, they will get a room, 3 square meals and monitoring. Not much of monitoring but people will check in with them. The hospital might more compassionate and the prison will try but maybe not as caring because they are overwhelmed with a growing population. I know there's a problem where the hospital will just keep them in for 24 hours and let them go. I don't know if anyone saw The 60 Mins Show on that Senator and his son. Where the son attacked his father in Virginia then killed himself due to the mere fact the hospital didn't have a bed for him. So he could decompress and get help. There wasn't a communication line between state hospitals for mentality distraught people so they had to let him go after a few hours, and also, health insurance wouldn't pay for one more minute. Had there been a Google search for hospital beds the dad would've driven clear across the state to get his son help. I mean Best Buy can search all their stores to find you the TV you want but hospitals can't.

Red tape sucks.

Prisons should, take this more seriously, and I hope they are. So I am unsure of the numbers, but I know people who go to prisons and try to connect to these people because of their own pasts. They talk, they hug, the laugh, the play songs but most of all, they engage with these hard headed people. By the time you've gotten to the big house.... there's alot of punk rock angst in you. Is this in every prison in the country? Probably not. Too much money. People learn from others that have gone through the same hell as them. The professionals, should learn this too, it works for AA and NA the other groups that are support oriented... and I am sure there's ALOT of this going on. So I suggested to my "group" in the car, that maybe they should keep this guy around on the basis of learning from him because there's more of this kind of a guy around. It could be applied and who knows, maybe after a few years, HE might come around  to become a "productive citizen"as the courts say. He probably wouldn't make outside the prison gates, BUT he would be feeling better knowing that he conquered his demons and help others along the way. All this kind of person wants is the ability to sleep at night, to have a clear mind and be appreciated.

Back to the TV Show, when all I hear and see are what's NOT being done then I tend to think well, there's a lot of dirty dishes that need to be cleaned.

Mental health runs deeper than a band-aid and neosporin. There's years of therapy, talk and medical treatment, group and one on one therapy. Sometimes you need to stop and start over - ALOT.  The length of the time to heal is a lifetime. Just ask a solider with PTSD. People have choices yes, but when they show signs of not thinking or behaving irrationally, then grab that person before it's too late. Get their thoughts elsewhere, for even just a minute. I've heard that you can even change a person when you smile at people on the street for the better.

I am not a mental health professional, I am not a doctor, I am a painter and a publicist. I don't believe in the death penalty and I feel that most misread verse in the Bible is "eye for and eye and tooth for a tooth." I am not the end decision of where one should go when you die. Although I like Dante's "Inferno" and the idea there... BUT I am a firm believer that when a problem arises there is a solution. There's got to be. We are too smart for our own good but we don't even know it. There are going to be many more issues like, movie theater, school and mall shootings. The best outcome was when the school administrator in Georgia just told the man - "Hey I love you." And that's all we wanna hear.

So I hope my "opinion" clicks with someone, and maybe opens the door to a brighter, better thinking, lovable world of theirs. As I sometimes will post on Facebook, Twitter or Google +  "I dare you to hug someone today."

JK